Introduction to the Jewish Wedding

By:

Rabbi Goldie Milgram [1]

These are the elements present as part of the process for most Jewish weddings:

1. An ufruf, where the impending marriage is blessed up at the Torah during a Shabbat prior to the wedding. During this aliyah (going up) often the couple is pelted with candy, suggesting a blessing for a "sweet relationship".

2. Mikveh, the day before or morning of the wedding, a private immersion in living waters (river, lake, ocean, sea, indoor mikveh facility, not a pond (which is standing water)--a beautiful, powerful ritual for preparing your body, mind, and spirit!

3. Signing of a ketubah, a Jewish wedding contract--infinite artistic varieties and both traditional and/or personalized statements can be within.

4. A marriage ritual held under a huppah, the wedding canopy, with opening psalms, a shared cup of wine, the blessings of wine and betrothal, and a vow of holy connection coupled with acceptance of a ring or object of similar value, seven wedding blessings, and the breaking of a wine glass. Remember to include children--what is a time of joy without their presence and their learning of the beauty of family, friends, and tradition through the joy of it! Better less opulence (no one needs to be impressed, that's just ego) and more strenthening of family and culture.

5. Yichud (pronounced, yee-khud) the couple takes a spate of private time together after the wedding ritual and before joining the party.

6. The wedding reception, called the seudah (meal) shel (of) mitzvah, which is the family's mitzvah of hosting the wedding guests with a meal. Remember to include children--what is a time of joy without their presence and their learning of the beauty of family, friends, and tradition through the joy of it!

Behind this list of terms is a world of spiritual beauty which it is helpful to study in order to be fully able to appreciate the power and mystery of the Jewish wedding. There are many magnificent ritual, liturgical and mystical options and elaborations for wedding preparation, as well as for the wedding itself.

Learn much more about Jewish Weddings in our book Living Jewish Life Cycle [3]: How to Create Meaningful Jewish Rites of Passage at Every Stage of Life.

Tags: